What makes a song great?
Wrong. The correct answer is; "a song is great if TrunkBunker says it's great."
Why? Haha... since you're new here, we'll not only let your rebellious questioning slide,
we'll even answer it (though in the future it would behoove you to never question us...
it's one of our pet peeves, that's all).
See, at TrunkBunker, we've covered all the phases... from adolescent popsters to teenage
metalheads... from elitist obscurists to insecure shoegazers... from stoner hippies to
business class-ical... from backwoods bluegrass to jazz hipsters... from east coast indie
to west coast rap... from pseudo protopunk to conservative prog rock... from pouty
krautrock to jammy glam... from popified country to countrified pop... so we're in a unique
position to judge the merits of all songs from all genres, free from the biases and
prejudices that afflict you and everyone else (you and everyone else make us sick).
That being the case, we felt obliged to produce a list... we couldn't very well have
everyone arguing the various merits of various songs without the ability to cite us to
prove their various cases, could we? It's up to you to decide if that's a rhetorical
question or not and respond accordingly. We'll wait...
So we present our list of the 2,000 greatest songs of all time (where all time = since
1900, give or take a couple of years... old school classical will have its' own list). Use
it as a guide to know what's great. Reference it when arguing your case with that co-worker
of yours who stubbornly has their own opinion. Quote it ad nauseum to impress your friends,
or at least, the people you think are your friends (quoting the list can only help).
Suggest it to others. Spread the love.
We constructed this list with no regard for the artist's influence, the artist's reputation,
the popularity of the song, the release date of the song, the genre of the song, the amount
of money slipped into our pockets (oh, we took it, we just didn't hold our end of the
bargain) or the sensuality of everyone involved. In essence, we simply convinced ourselves
that every song was performed by the Beatles and released in 1967. Level playing field.
Also note that, relative to the overall amount of songs created, 2000 is a miniscule number.
Many of our favorites are not on the list, particularly those that work best as part of the
album concept. Sure, we could have thrown in a song here or there to flaunt our musical
supremacy, but that would be dishonest to the list, and honesty to our lists is basically
all we have (oh right, except for the stunning good looks, enviable brilliance, luminous
personality and ability to fly). Plus, we're above the need to flaunt our vast musical
superiority that dwarfs all who would dare challenge us. So there are many outstanding
artists that will be absent here, what with the constraint of 2000 and all. Deal with it.
We feel like we've done a bang-up job building the excitement for the official unveiling of
our list... your anticipation is virtually jumping through the screen, and if we're not
mistaken, it appears as though you're quite sexually aroused. Exactly what we were going
for....